I’ve realized something very important…
…and that is I need to really get serious with my relationships.
Well, for starters, I do have lots of relationships, but those never include a romantic relationship with that special someone. It’s been like that for the past eighteen years and I’ve heard people tease me being gay because I never had a girlfriend. Oh well, to those guys, screw you!
I’ve realized that I just look from a far and stare, but that would not do anything, it would not produce results. I then tried many ways, but often times, it becomes an epic fail. Sucks…
What I think I should do is to man up and talk about it directly. Not arrogantly, but gently and peacefully. Talk to her about this and then wait for the fair lady’s reply. This is where it gets hard.
If ever she says something favorable and positive, I might as well give it a shot and hope for the best, if ever she says something unfavorable and negative – which is a 89% possibility, I should just calmly accept the facts and move on with my life. I lived for eighteen years without her, It’s no big deal really. As they say, there’s plenty fishes in the sea. If ever she say that she would think about it, I would consider myself lucky. She’ll be thinking of me for a while, and that would be a good thing. At lease I get to run in her mind.
Well, for now, I must settle the real problem…who’s it gonna be?
I have two candidates.
The first one is some one very close to me. We are actually friends when we we’re in high school, and luckily, until now. She is beautiful in her way, and most often, people tell me that she’s a little bit weird, but I can’t see those things. Those really don’t matter, I love her and I do care for her, even though I’ve told her through my jokes and all and yet she still resists. We’ll be hiding her personality in the name of Toni.
The second one is some one from church. We never really speak to each other, but the catch is that I’m friends with her family, and her family knows that I really like her, and I bet she knows it too. A little birdie told me that she’s being civil with me, and I did choose to believe that one, but I told myself that I can change that by giving me a chance to introduce myself to her. She’s smart – always part of the Dean’s Lister, Highly fashionable – party clothes are her thing, but there’s something about her serene face that haunts me, maybe it is her unknown side, only her family and friends knows that. So, now, we’ll be hiding her personality in the name of Milcah.
This is really something, It’s hard to choose because both are beautiful in their own way. I loved everything about the both of them. Now it’s up to me to decide. It’s now or never.
